There's a New Sheriff in Town

It's always in the mornings when the crazy shines. I'm not sure if it the issues we are dealing with, that time of day, or I just walked in from the real world and haven't quiet adjusted.

 The first hour of each day is spent in a large room with tables and chairs, coffee, a microwave, refrigerator, etc. And as everyone arrives we are supposed to spend the hour "Journaling". Everyone has their own journal. I have carried one around for years just to jot interesting and funny situations I run into and know I will never remember the details, etc. But, I digress.

To paraphrase the therapists, the idea is open up your mind and write down whatever comes to you. You can write letters. You can write feelings, frustrations, your mood, your plans, heck, you can write your grocery list. It is whatever comes into your head. No one else ever sees it. Naturally, I am always noting stories of my "adventures" in therapy.

Anyway, one morning I walked in, spoke to everyone, and before I could put my bag down a voice from the other end of room shouted. "Don't ya sit yet. Unt uh. There's a new rule. Yous  gotta  sign this here paper," and she pointed to a clipboard in front of her.

I cheerfully said, "OK, let me put my things down and I'll be right there." George was sitting across the table. He just smiled and rolled his eyes. I had never seen this lady before. Quickly I walked down to where she sat. Lord knows I did not want to be scolded again. I knew she wasn't with the center because she was not wearing one of their required ID badges.

On the clip board was a sign-in sheet asking for our name, time we arrived, and if we needed refills on any of our medications. It did not take me two seconds to comply. I looked up and smiled, "There, I guess now I'm officially here."

"Yes girl there is new rule, uh huh, every moning, first thing, everybody gotta sign this fome."

I said, "I'll remember tomorrow, first thing when I get here."

"Ya better. Now, ya know."

I went to the refrigerator, got a drink, and sat down. John happened to be sitting next to me. He leaned his head toward me and quietly said, "There's a new sheriff in town in case you didn't notice."

I laughed, "No kidding. She's pretty serious." And with that I pulled out my journal and started writing. It was very quiet, like it usually was as everyone wrote out there thoughts and, supposedly cleared their minds. The (peace and) quiet was suddenly interrupted by loud music from the other end of the room.

Janie (the new sheriff whose name I learned later) was up on her feet dancing. She was being egged on by another patient, Felicia (whom I did know). "You go girl. You still got it," said Felicia.

Janie responded,"I'm gonna do the electric slide. Y'all get up and dance." No one moved.

Felicia spoke up, "Know what you need girl? You need you a man."

Janie now dancing with her hands over her head responded, "Ain't gonna happen. Been through three, ain't nuttin but trouble." The music and dancing continued for five minutes or so until they either tired or lost interest. Quiet returned to the room.

The therapist walked in at the end of the period, with warm greetings. Then he asked if everyone had signed in. Everyone replied that they had. From across the table someone said, "Janie took care of it. She was quiet efficient."

The therapist laughed, "Thanks Janie for doing that."

"Glad to help. Ya just gotta catch 'em befo they sit."

The therapist replied, "Well I don't think we needed to be that efficient."

"When I do sumpem, I do it right."

Yep I thought, God bless what was left of those three men who were "nutten but trouble" when she got through with them. But, if not for her efficient command of the sign-in sheet, she at least deserved a star for her performance of the electric slide.